


Karma.

by Waltzwashere



Series: Conversations. [1]
Category: Boruto: Naruto Next Generations, Naruto
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Brotherly Bonding, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Sad, abuse mention, they swear alot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-12 17:22:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29513157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waltzwashere/pseuds/Waltzwashere
Summary: Boruto and Kawaki talk after a meeting with the 5 Kage.
Relationships: Kawaki & Uzumaki Boruto
Series: Conversations. [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2170281
Comments: 3
Kudos: 16





	1. Karma.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for getting this far.

“Aren’t you angry?” Kawaki glared at his brother’s undisturbed expression. “Why?” Kawaki whispered desperately. “What’s the matter with you!? You’re just sitting there. Why aren’t you yelling or telling them their plan is bullshit!?” 

“Because their plan is fine,” Boruto answered nonchalantly. “I actually can’t think of a better one-” Kawaki slammed his fist on the nearby table. 

“I can’t believe this. You’re accepting their shit plan?” 

“Yes.” 

“Why?” 

“Why what? You want me to explain everything that just happened? Everything that we just talked about with the 5 Kage? There’s nothing more.” Kawaki sat back astounded. 

“This isn’t you, you’re always fighting. You’re stubborn as fuck, so why aren’t you angry?” 

“Kawaki.” 

_“We’re going to die Boruto.”_ Kawaki leaned in finally seeing sorrow upon Boruto’s face. “Doesn’t that make you sad? Frustrated? Terrified? Anything?” He leaned in more. "We’ll never get to see our friends again. Never get to play again. Never get to breathe again, it'll be over.” 

“It scares me, but the alternative-”

“The alternative is to reject this shit plan and fight to live.”

“Fight? Okay, then. You want to walk in, pull a kunai to Dad’s neck? Or what about Uncle Gaara, want me to fight him too!? How far do you think we’ll get you fucking idiot!? We’ll be obliterated before we walk into the room.”

“I don’t mean fight them I mean fight… fight this decision!” 

“Then what do we do!? What do you have planned!? How do we stop this!?” Kawaki fell silent. “You don’t even have a plan and you’re yelling at me to fight? What’s the point, to fight so we die tomorrow instead of today? To risk the chance we murder more people? Even if there was a long elaborate way to stop the curse mark. I’d _still_ choose this!” 

“Really? So if there was a way to stop this, you’d choose to die? How? You were the one who… you’re always telling people to live. How can you give up without even trying?” Boruto paused staring at his brother.

“Do you know how often I think about Sasuke?” Boruto muttered, the words aching him as they came out. Kawaki’s mouth zipped shut. “Every moment, every day, since the second he died. That was two years ago. There hasn’t been a moment I haven’t thought about him. I can’t even begin to think about how Sarada feels.” Kawaki continued to listen. Boruto always refused to talk about Sasuke. Boruto would quite literally throw a tantrum at 16 years old if anyone asked him about his Uncle. “Can you imagine what it would do to me if I killed Mom or our sister?” 

“You’re giving up over something that might happen-”

“ _Might?_ Might!? I already killed one of the strongest shinobi! He was the only person who could kill me. Who promised to kill me. Every day I wake up terrified that I killed someone in my sleep. I can’t do that anymore, Kawaki. So I don’t care if I have to die. Unless you have a way to take away this curse mark right now, _I die_ , period.”

“You really are giving up,” Kawaki chuckled. “You’re a coward, Boruto.”

“Fine, I’ll be a coward. I don’t care.” Kawaki balled his fist unsatisfied. 

“What changed? Before you were so ready to suck up to Dad’s ass so he’ll forgive you for what you did to Sasuke.” Boruto scowled. “Dad and the Kazekage haven’t agreed to this shit plan yet because Lord Seventh always finds something in nothing. But you want to give up before he even has a chance! What the fuck Boruto!? I get that you're self-destructive but this is something else.”

“Why’re you saying all this, trying to bully me into giving a fuck? Well, you’re right. I’d do anything to make up for killing Sasuke. I did everything Dad said even if I didn’t want to. But this is different, I can’t do what he wants this time. Dad would never agree to common sense because we’re his sons. Then again I guess he _does_ always find something in nothing.” 

“What about your promise to Sarada? You said you’d protect her when she became the Hokage. What are you gonna do, leave her to be protected by Shikadai, shadow boy? What’s he gonna do? Scare niggas away with his little black puppetry?”

“Now you’re just being mean. Sarada will be fine, Shikadai will be fine. I’m not Dad, my existence isn’t crucial. I’m just his asshole son. People will remember me because of Dad’s tears. Not because of me.” Kawaki looked down at his brother. “What? Are you finally disappointed? What are you going to say? That I'm being a bitch, that I should try and just see what happens, I’m delusional. Or maybe you’ll say I'm special and the world will miss me if I’m gone. That Mom needs me or Himawari… or Dad.” Kawaki held his brother's shoulders, making him stop. 

“Yes.” Boruto looked up, blinking away his tears. 

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, I’m disappointed. Yes, you’re being a bitch. Yes, we should try and see what happens. Yes, you’re being delusional. Yes, I’ll miss you- even if I was dead too. And yes, Mom and Himawari need you alive.” Kawaki was hugging him. It was weird but oddly homey.

“You said… that I suck up to my Dad, but this time something changed. Maybe because this is something I want.” Kawaki shook his head. “So-” 

“What would Sasuke want?” 

“How am I-?”

“Just answer.” 

“He’d want everyone safe obviously. He was the first one ready to kill me.” 

“He was ready to kill you. That day when we fought Isshiki he was ready to murder you.” Boruto looked down. “But for a moment, before it happened, he said. I don’t want to kill you, I’m sorry. Then he faltered.” Kawaki whispered softly. “He hesitated… then…” 

“But he promised… he was ready to…” They slowly slid to the floor. 

“He didn’t half kill his student… so that’s something,” Kawaki said, hating his words immediately. “But I guess he probably doesn’t like that you killed him so nevermind.” 

“Yeah.” 

“Maybe we should stop saying that.” 

“Saying what?” 

“That you killed Sasuke. It wasn’t you, it was Momoshiki Otsutsuki. That prick.” 

“I know what a piece of shit.” 

“Ugly ass nigga.” 

“Two horned pale bitch.” They burst out into laughter for a moment. Kawaki let go, allowing Boruto and him to rest their backs on the side of the table. They didn’t talk for a moment, letting their argument rest; enjoying the silence until Boruto turned slowly. “Are you scared to die Kawaki?” His brother exhaled. 

“Yeah,” Kawaki looked down. “No, actually I’m more scared of dying before the right time I suppose.” 

“I see, I think the same for me.” 

“My,” Kawaki took a deep breath. “My birth father used to beat me half to death, but he never cared enough to get to the death part. And Jigen, well he didn’t want me dead yet. Now I have the greatest Dad ever. I kind of… want to keep that going.” He mumbled.

“It’s as you said, Lord Seventh and Lord Kazekage haven’t made a decision yet. So the 5 Kage haven’t set anything in stone. We should get going.” 

“What?” 

“We’ll leave.” 

“Now?”

“Dad is stubborn, he'll never agree to kill us. And honestly, if Dad won’t, Uncle Gaara probably won’t either. But the other Kage will want us gone to protect their own villages. Truthfully the Mizukage and the Tsuchikage will probably break first. Our decision could cause a war.” Kawaki gulped. “But if we leave, and there’s no trace that the Hidden Leaf or the Hokage knew about it. We could avoid war for now.” 

“So we leave and find a way to get rid of this curse mark. So Dad doesn’t half make this decision.” Kawaki stood up, helping Boruto stand. “We’ll be labeled rogue ninja, they’ll send people after us. Quite possibly our friends. Are you ready for that?” 

“Goddamn, one thing at a time.” The blond boy’s arms unveiled a blue mark all over his arms. “You ready?” Kawaki nodded, Boruto opened a black portal. 

“This better not bite us in the ass Boruto. I’d like to spend time with our family again.” 

“You’re thinking of the wrong Karma, Kawaki.” 

“Funny.” 


	2. Innocent.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prequel to Karma, Momoshiki had something to tell Boruto.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wrote this in an hour so there are probably mistakes but I'll fix it tomorrow.

The first time the line-  _ murder is just murder _ -cascaded into Boruto’s mind, was when he, as in Momoshiki had murdered 33 people. At that time it wasn’t his words he was sure. Because the shift in the way his brain worked was evident. His guilt was drowning him, he was self-destructing. No eating- no showering- no playing- don’t enjoy. Just remember the people he killed-  _ you killed _ . He was dying from mental pain when the parasite so desperate to keep its host alive said to him. Murder is just murder. So does it really matter? Boruto laughed maniacally.

Was that his condolence? Was that his comfort? He ripped people away from existence but just forget about it? It doesn’t matter? Murder isn’t just murder, Boruto thought. He doubled down. No moving- no thinking- no nothing- just let his mind ooze laying on his bed. 

Boruto’s door opened. His brother gave him a look of fear. Pure fear for where his mind was twisting off to. Then it molded into worry. “The 5 Kage want to talk to us.” Boruto sighed, turning his head back to the empty ceiling. Moving meant caring. Moving meant trying. Moving meant letting the parasite in him keep living. Eventually, he was whisked away against his will. But he was so happy that he was. 

When Boruto heard the 5 Kage, or more like the 3 Kage’s plan, he was maddeningly happy. So fucking happy. He didn’t smile; his mouth a gape. He didn’t say a word there was nothing else to add, that was a perfect plan.  _ Kill me, ya know _ . His brother and father were arguing for something else? No, no. Shut up, Shut up. Let him bathe in this victory, goddamn it! 

His brother got too worked up so they sent Boruto and him to another room. In the hallway, Kawaki punched a wall. He aggressively wiped some tears before painfully muttering something. “I just started to live my life... as more than a tool. There’s no way in hell I’ll let them take that away from me.” And just like that, all the joy in Boruto’s heart hardened back into guilt. Even if he was innocent. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you this about this little series? I might write more.


	3. Solace.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Boruto and Kawaki have a conversation while being rouge ninja.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting this before the new episode tomorrow, let's see what happens.

Boruto pulled his cloak onto his head hiding from the rain. These days everything was temporary. His hair, his clothes, the cloak around his neck. His well-being, his appetite, the bed he slept in if he was lucky enough to find one. The only consistency was his brother Kawaki, and his sword that he… acquired from Sasuke. For the most part, those were enough. 

He pushed through the forest finding an old shack he and his brother had found a few days ago. He opened the door setting his eyes on the thinning blanket he calls his bed. He dropped to the floors like a block of lead. “Ow.” His brother chucked behind him. 

“You’re gonna give yourself a concussion if you keep doing that.” Kawaki was sitting on a chair eating a meal of crackers and jerky.

“Shut up,” Boruto mumbled, rubbing his face. “I keep forgetting.” 

“That we’re not at home, in our room?”

“I dunno how you’re used to this.”

“I wouldn’t say I’m used to it. But my father used to kick me out sometimes. It's familiar.” Kawaki took a deep breath. “The good old days.” 

“Hm.” They sat in silence, the sounds of rain around them. Kawaki peered at his brother; who hadn't moved an inch or spoken much. 

“When was the last time you ate?” 

“Yesterday.”

“Are you hungry?” 

“Not really.” Kawaki sighed.

“Can I ask?”

“Ask what?”

“How are you doing?”

“Me wise or him wise?”

“Both.”

Boruto turned around, laying on his back. “Me wise… I suppose I’m not used to this rouge lifestyle yet. And him wise… he’s been-” _Loud, annoying, murderous, angry, talkative._ “Quiet.” His brother nodded slowly. 

“You’re a terrible liar.” Boruto closed his eyes laughing dryly. “If you don’t want to talk about it it’s fine.” 

“It’s not that.” 

“Then?”

“I just don’t want to complain.” 

“You don’t want to complain?” Boruto nodded firmly. “I think we’ve been through enough- we can complain. You obviously were lying when you said, quiet. So? Did something happen while you were out? Did he say any fucked up shit to you?” Boruto didn’t move, he didn’t answer. “Say something damn it.” 

“Nothing happened. _I’m fine._ ” Kawaki scoffed. 

“If you’re going to lie to my face Boruto at least try harder!” 

“Then you go! How are you fucking doing!?” The blonde boy sat up glaring daggers at his brother. 

“I’m doing terribly, thank you for asking!” 

“Same here!” 

“Great!” Both boys turned away from each other. Their conversations of late always managed to turn heated. But it was always temporary. Then they sighed and turned back staring for a moment. “Did he come out?” 

“No. He just said some shit it’s not a big deal.” Kawaki frowned. 

“Um, no. It kind of is. The last time he said some shit that _wasn’t a big deal,_ you were ready to let anything or anyone kill you.” 

“Whatever, it’s fine.” 

“We’ve talked about this before, why not now?” 

“Nothing.” 

“Dude, are you serious?” 

“I just don’t want to complain.” 

“But why?” 

“Nothing.” 

“Boruto.” 

“Enough.” 

“We always talk this through, you know I’m here for you, right?.” 

“I know that.” 

“So tell me what’s going on!” 

“No!” 

“Why!?” 

“I already told you! I don’t want to burden you!” 

“That doesn’t make any fucking sense! We always talk about this shit together! So what changed!?” 

“Nothing!”

“Did you hurt anyone?” 

“No.” 

“Did someone recognize you?” 

“No!” 

“Did you see Sarada or any Hidden Leaf shinobi?” 

“No! Nothing!”

“Then what the fuck happened!?” 

“Fuck!” Boruto threw his fist at the wooden wall. Kawaki watched the withered wood shatter and break apart. Boruto’s hand touched the rain outside. Slowly his brother pulled his fist back inside coddling it in his other hand. 

“There’s wood in your hand let me-” 

“No, I got it.” Kawaki stepped back this time, hurt a bit. He watched Boruto pull some of the wood pieces. 

“Whatever he said to you that made you feel like you can’t trust me it’s bullshit.” 

“He didn’t say anything like that. You have your own stuff to worry about. Just focus on that.” Kawaki threw up his eyebrows. 

“The fuck are you talking about? These past months everything I’ve been through- you’ve been through. **We** were given Karma. **We** were treated as tools. **We** both have blood on our hands because of the parasites in us. **We** were supposed to be murdered by our own kin to save everyone. **We** left the village together!”

“But before that, before Sasuke’s death. What did we have other than a black diamond on our hands? Before we went through a similar trauma- we had nothing in common! We were different.” Kawaki stared at his brother shaking his head. He grabbed Boruto’s shoulders aggressively.

“Tell me what happened or I’ll knock your lights out faster than that time Sarada punched you for using that sexy jutsu around her.” His brother paused.

“Fine,” Boruto said but didn’t continue.

“Go on then.”

“You had a night terror.” The black-haired boy backed away, confused. He let go of Boruto’s shoulders. Of all things, he wasn't expecting that.

“I don’t remember.” 

“I figured you didn’t.” 

“What happened?” Boruto sighed. 

“You just started screaming… begging for… him to stop. I tried to wake you, but you kept flinching away. I thought your dream was about Karma- or killing those civilians- or…” 

“It was about my birth father.” 

“Yeah.”

“I see.”

“I just realized that I’ve been relying on you too much. Back then after the 5 Kage meeting. I was ready to die. Actually, I was happy about it. I didn’t think about how you felt. Didn’t even cross my mind. Not until I saw how hard you wanted to continue. You pushed me to live. It’s stupid.” 

“It should be you saving me then, right?” 

“I could have tried more! I mean, when I turned 14 I knew pain. Us and pain are practically family. But your whole life was- is pain. At least for me, I had a childhood I could look on fondly. After the fight with Isshiki, I relied on you, but never gave a damn about you.” Boruto took a breath. “After seeing you last night so terrified over something that happened so long ago. I realized that I should be your shoulder; helping you with your pain.” 

“Boruto,” His brother called. “You know suffering. Yes, you were privileged. All the way from your blonde hair to your blue eyes. But god, I don’t know what it’s like to murder a family member.” 

“I...” Boruto held Sasuke’s sword.

“Our experiences aren’t comparable, pain is pain.” 

“But your childhood was-” 

“Awful and yours was amazing I know, I know. But hiding your pain from me isn’t going to help me heal. If I feel overwhelmed I’ll tell you. Don’t hide your pain from me or I swear I’ll give you a black eye!” 

“Ok, ok.” Boruto smiled. “God, I keep making unnecessary problems.”

“I know.” Kawaki yawned. “It’s a tough burden having a little brother.”

“Ew. Don’t call me that.” 

“What? You’re little by age and height, and you’re my brother. It’s only fitting.” 

“You’re not calling me little brother.” 

“Then how about just brother?” 

“Perfect.” Kawaki smiled softly.

“You say you didn’t do anything for me but I should thank you.” 

“Huh? Thank me?” 

“Thank you for letting me be an Uzumaki. And thank you for letting me be a part of your family.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “When did we become brothers? Was it when I called Lord Seventh Dad?” 

“No, it was earlier than that.” 

“Oh, the whole vase thing? I apologized like a million times but you really didn’t budge.” 

“No, even before that.” 

“When?” 

“Probably the first time I saw you. I had just activated my Karma for the first time. I was so scared and confused- and then we found you. And you had the same mark. I felt connected to you before I even knew your name.” 

“Ah, I see.” Boruto finally sat back down. And Kawaki returned to his meal of crackers and jerky. He offered some to his little brother and though he was reluctant he ate something. Then he laid back down. Kawaki moved from the chair to lay now next to his brother.

“This is all temporary,” Boruto said with crumbs all over his face.

“Hm?” 

“Changing clothes, names, appearances. Sleeping in these shitty places, almost getting killed. Almost killing someone else. Being on the run. All this shit is temporary. One day we’ll kill these sons of bitches that call us vessels and we’ll see our family again. It will all be over. I promise you’ll get to enjoy having a real father.” Kawaki looked over, for the first time in months he saw what Mitsuki had called his sun. That bright determination that was written all over Boruto’s crumbled-filled face.

“Yeah, I’d like that,” Kawaki whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This might be the last one for Karma, unless I think of anything else. Or unless you beautiful people have any ideas.

**Author's Note:**

> I guess this is an alternate universe where Sasuke couldn't kill Boruto. (Also, I headcanon Kawaki as black.)


End file.
